红字-the scarlet letter(英文版)-第34部分
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tes to take off thisbadge。〃 calmly replied Hester。 〃Were I worthy to be quit of it； itwould fall away of its own nature； or be transformed into somethingthat should speak a different purport。〃 〃Nay； then； wear it； if it suit you better；〃 rejoined he。 〃A womanmust needs follow her own fancy touching the adornment of herperson。 The letter is gaily embroidered； and shows right bravely onyour bosom！〃 All this while； Hester had been looking steadily at the old man； andwas shocked； as well as wonder…smitten； to discern what a change hadbeen wrought upon him within the past seven years。 It was not somuch that he had grown older； for though the traces of advancinglife were visible； he bore his age well； and seemed to retain a wiryvigour and alertness。 But the former aspect of an intellectual andstudious man； calm and quiet； which was what she best remembered inhim； had altogether vanished； and been succeeded by an eager；searching； almost fierce； yet carefully guarded look。 It seemed tobe his wish and purpose to mask this expression with a smile； butthe latter played him false； and flickered over his visage soderisively； that the spectator could see his blackness all thebetter for it。 Ever and anon； too； there came a glare of red light outof his eyes； as if the old man's soul were on fire； and kept onsmouldering duskily within his breast； until； by some casual puff ofpassion； it was blown into a momentary flame。 This he repressed； asspeedily as possible； and strove to look as if nothing of the kind hadhappened。 In a word； old Roger Chillingworth was a striking evidence ofman's faculty of transforming himself into a devil； if he will only；for a reasonable space of time； undertake a devil's office。 Thisunhappy person had effected such a transformation； by devotinghimself； for seven years； to the constant analysis of a heart fullof torture； and deriving his enjoyment thence； and adding fuel tothose fiery tortures which he analysed and gloated over。 The scarlet letter burned on Hester Prynne's bosom。 Here was anotherruin； the responsibility of which came partly home to her。 〃What see you in my face；〃 asked the physician； 〃that you look at itso earnestly？〃 〃Something that would make me weep； if there were any tears bitterenough for it；〃 answered she。 〃But let it pass！ It is of yondermiserable man that I would speak。〃 〃And what of him？〃 cried Roger Chillingworth eagerly； as if he lovedthe topic； and were glad of an opportunity to discuss it with the onlyperson of whom he could make a confidant。 〃Not to hide the truth；Mistress Hester； my thoughts happen just now to be busy with thegentleman。 So speak freely； and I will make answer。〃 〃When we last spake together；〃 said Hester； 〃now seven years ago； itwas your pleasure to extort a promise of secrecy； as touching theformer relation betwixt yourself and me。 As the life and good fameof yonder man were in your hands； there seemed no choice to me； saveto be silent； in accordance with your behest。 Yet it was not withoutheavy misgivings that I thus bound myself； for； having cast off allduty towards other human beings； there remained a duty towards him；and something whispered me that I was betraying it； in pledging myselfto keep your counsel。 Since that day； no man is so near to him as you。You tread behind his every footstep。 You are beside him； sleepingand waking。 You search his thoughts。 You burrow and rankle in hisheart！ Your clutch is on his life； and you cause him to die daily aliving death； and still he knows you not。 In permitting this； I havesurely acted a false part by the only man to whom the power was leftme to be true！〃 〃What choice had you？〃 asked Roger Chillingworth。 〃My finger；pointed at this man； would have hurled him from his pulpit into adungeon… thence； peradventure； to the gallows！〃 〃It had been better so！〃 said Hester Prynne。 〃What evil have I done the man？〃 asked Roger Chillingworth again。 〃Itell thee； Hester Prynne； the richest fee that ever physician earnedfrom monarch could not have bought such care as I have wasted onthis miserable priest！ But for my aid； his life would have burned awayin torments； within the first two years after the perpetration ofhis crime and thine。 For； Hester； his spirit lacked the strengththat could have borne up； as thine has； beneath a burden like thyscarlet letter。 Oh； I could reveal a goodly secret！ But enough！ Whatart can do； I have exhausted on him。 That he now breathes； andcreeps upon earth； is owing all to me！〃 〃Better he had died at once！〃 said Hester Prynne。 〃Yea； woman； thou sayest truly！〃 cried old Roger Chillingworth；letting the lurid fire of his heart blaze out before her eyes。 〃Betterhad he died at once！ Never did mortal suffer what this man hassuffered。 And all； all； in the sight of his worst enemy！ He has beenconscious of me。 He has felt an influence dwelling always upon himlike a curse。 He knew； by some spiritual sense… for the Creator nevermade another being so sensitive as this… he knew that no friendly handwas pulling at his heart…strings； and that an eye was lookingcuriously into him； which sought only evil； and found it。 But heknew not that the eye and hand were mine！ With the superstition monto his brotherhood； he fancied himself given over to a fiend； to betortured with frightful dreams； and desperate thoughts； the sting ofremorse； and despair of pardon； as a foretaste of what awaits himbeyond the grave。 But it was the constant shadow of my presence！…the closest propinquity of the man whom he had most vilely wronged！…and who had grown to exist only by this perpetual poison of the direstrevenge！ Yea； indeed！… he did not err！… there was a fiend at hiselbow！ A mortal man； with once a human heart； has bee a fiend forhis especial torment！〃 The unfortunate physician； while uttering these words； lifted hishands with a look of horror； as if he had beheld some frightful shape；which he could not recognise； usurping the place of his own image in aglass。 It was one of those moments… which sometimes occur only atthe interval of years… when a man's moral aspect is faithfullyrevealed to his mind's eye。 Not improbably； he had never before viewedhimself as he did now。 〃Hast thou not tortured him enough？〃 said Hester； noticing the oldman's look。 〃Has he not paid thee all？〃 〃No！… no！… he has but increased the debt！〃 answered the physician；and as he proceeded； his manner lost its fiercer characteristics；and subsided into gloom。 〃Dost thou remember me； Hester； as I was nineyears agone？ Even then； I was in the autumn of my days； nor was it theearly autumn。 But all my life had been made up of earnest； studious；thoughtful； quiet years； bestowed faithfully for the increase ofmine own knowledge； and faithfully； too； though this latter object wasbut casual to the other… faithfully for the advancement of humanwelfare。 No life had been more peaceful and innocent than mine； fewlives so rich with benefits conferred。 Dost thou remember me？ Was Inot； though you might deem me cold； nevertheless a man thoughtfulfor others； craving little for himself… kind； true； just； and ofconstant； if not warm affections？ Was I not all this？〃 〃All this； and more；〃 said Hester。 〃And what am I now？〃 demanded he； looking into her face； andpermitting the whole evil within him to be written on his features。 〃Ihave already told thee what I am！ A fiend！ Who made me so？〃 〃It was myself！〃 cried Hester； shuddering。 〃It was I； not lessthan he。 Why hast thou not avenged thyself on me？〃 〃I have left thee to the scarlet letter；〃 replied RogerChillingworth。 〃If that have not avenged me； I can do no more！〃 He laid his finger on it； with a smile。 〃It has avenged thee！〃 answered Hester Prynne。 〃I judged no less；〃 said the physician。 〃And now； what wouldstthou with me touching this man？〃 〃I must reveal the secret；〃 answered Hester firmly。 〃He must discernthee in thy true character。 What may be the result； I know not。 Butthis long debt of confidence； due from me to him； whose bane andruin I have been； shall at length be paid。 So far as concerns theoverthrow or preservation of his fair fame and his earthly state；and perchance his life； he is in thy hands。 Nor do I… whom the scarletletter has disciplined to truth； though it be the truth of red…hotiron； entering into the soul… nor do I perceive such advantage inhis living any longer a life of ghastly emptiness； that I shallstoop to implore thy mercy。 Do with him as thou wilt！ There is no goodfor him… no good for me… no good for thee！ There is no good for littlePearl！ There is no path to guide us out of this dismal maze。〃 〃Woman； I could well…nigh pity thee！〃 said Roger Chillingworth；unable to restrain a thrill of admiration too； for there ajestic in the despair which she expressed。 〃Thou hadstgreat elements。 Peradventure； hadst thou met earlier with a betterlove than mine； this evil had not been。 I pity thee； for the good thathas been wasted in thy nature！〃 〃And I thee；〃 answered Hester Prynne； 〃for the hatred that hastransformed a wise and just man to a fiend！ Wilt thou yet purge it outof thee； and be once more human？ If not for his sake； then doublyfor thine own！ Forgive； and leave his further retribution to the Powerthat claims it！ I said； but now； that there could be no good event forhim； or thee； or me； who are here wandering toget
